An Act of Restraint: Order & Chaos Book 1 Read online

  "Have you thought about where you'd like it?" I asked matter-of-factly.

  "I was thinking my right shoulder blade area."

  I nodded, trying to school my face into a professional expression. "There are a lot of symbols for change and rebirth," I said. "A lot of people get butterflies or flowers, but you don't strike me as a flowers and butterflies kind of woman. I'm thinking you want something bold that makes a statement."

  "Exactly," she said as a look of pleasant surprise came over her face.

  I met her eyes again, this time looking at her in an accessing way that wasn't sexual at all. I got the sense that Jenny was a fiercely passionate woman. The word "fiery" just popped into my head, and I instantly knew exactly what would suit her perfectly. I could see it clearly in my mind's eye, fully formed and waiting to be brought to life. My pencil started gliding across the paper in my lap almost of its own accord.

  "What do you know about the legend of the phoenix?" I asked her without looking up from my sketchpad.

  "Um...It's a mythical bird that burns up in fire when it dies and then is reborn from its own ashes. It was a Greek myth right?"

  "And Roman," I answered as my left hand flew almost frantically across the page. Sometimes it was like this. It was as if my hand almost wasn't fast enough to get the image out of my head. "It was also Egyptian and Chinese. And I believe Persian and some others I can't recall right now. It's a symbol of rebirth, regeneration, and immortality."

  There was a long answering silence that made me pause and glance up at her. She was staring at me with a shocked, yet impressed expression. I smiled widely at her. I was used to surprising people like this, and it never got old. It was easy to see only my tattoos and gruff exterior, and not look any deeper. The assumptions never bothered me much, and I could sometimes use it to my advantage. At this point in my life, I didn't really care what most people thought of me. Surprisingly, I actually cared what Jenny thought, and it made me feel good that I impressed her.

  "You had a stodgy old philosophy professor. I had a stodgy old classical mythology professor when I was working on my liberal arts degree." I smirked at her.

  "Really?" Her eyebrows rose, and she smiled. "Color me impressed. There's a lot more to you than just a pretty face."

  "Pretty?" I asked with raised brows and a laugh, trying to downplay the flirtatious undertones in her comment. She was a client, and I couldn't go there. "No one has ever described me like that before either."

  She shrugged, her face unapologetic. "Just calling it like I see it." She boldly let her eyes travel over my body again, her expression heated and appreciative. I focused on my sketchpad once more, before I ended up eye-fucking her right back. I knew exactly where that would lead. I never hooked up with a client before, and I wasn't about to start now.

  We lapsed into silence for a while as I lost myself in my drawing. I could feel her eyes on me most of the time, but it didn't bother me. In fact, I kind of liked it. When I finished, I looked up to meet her eyes again. Her brows rose in excited curiosity. I suddenly felt a little apprehensive about showing it to her, which was really odd for me.

  "If the size isn't quite what you want, I can change it," I said a little nervously. "Or anything else you're not happy with."

  "Okay," she said as she leaned forward and squirmed excitedly. It made her tits jiggle in a distracting way that I couldn't help but stare at for a moment. Of course, I got busted checking her out again. This time I couldn't help myself, and I returned her smirk with a heated look of my own as I leaned toward her. I didn't realize I was even doing until I noticed her start biting her lower lip, and her eyes turned glossy and dilated. My grip on my sketchpad tightened. I leaned back and cleared my throat as I handed the sketchpad to her, breaking our eye contact. Shit. I couldn't let that happen again.

  "Here," I said in a voice that wasn't as calm as I'd hoped. She took it, and I made sure I didn't accidentally touch her since I had to get my libido to settle down before I was forced to for the tattoo.

  She glanced down at the sketchpad, and drew in a sudden breath. "Oh my God," she blurted out in a soft whisper, her eyes wide as she looked over the page. "It's...it's beautiful." She looked up and smiled radiantly at me. She stared down at it again, awe written all over her face. "I love it. It's perfect."

  I almost sighed in relief, wondering why her approval mattered so much to me. My drawing was of a phoenix with wings spread wide, the feathers blending out into flames at the edges. Its neck was curved regally with a long crest on its head. The bird's long tail feathers curved and curled around themselves, turning into flames at their tips. The whole thing was probably a good six by seven inches, and pretty big for the first-time tattoo that I suspected this was for her.

  "I'm thinking lots of reds, yellows, and oranges," I told her softly. "I want the flames to look fiery and intense."

  "When can I get it done?" she asked, meeting my eyes again excitedly.

  "Well," I said seriously as I glanced around the room with a smirk and leaned toward her. "If you don't mind waiting behind all these other people, I could probably squeeze you in today."

  "Today?" she asked incredulously, totally ignoring my attempt at humor. A panicked look fell over her face. "Uh...um...okay." She didn't sound sure at all.

  I leaned back and gave her a knowing smile. "You've never had a tattoo before have you?"

  "No." She shook her head. "Is that going to be a problem?" she asked, her voice getting a little defensive as her eyes flashed blue fire.

  "Of course not," I reassured her, trying to ignore how hot she was when she started getting angry. "If you're too nervous today, we can do it another time."

  Her back suddenly straightened, and she set her jaw stubbornly in a way that I found incredibly hot too. "I'm going to do it today." She sounded more like she was trying to convince herself than me.

  "Alright." I stood abruptly. "Let's get to it then."

  She stood and nodded jerkily, a wild look of fear in her eyes.

  "Follow me on back." Despite her obvious fear, she strode along with me to my tattoo room. I motioned her inside. "Just have a seat in that chair for now. It'll take me a bit to get set up," I said in a low-key voice, trying to keep her calm. "I'll be right back." On a whim, I went out front again and turned off the open sign and locked up for the day. I didn't want any interruptions while I was with this client. I wanted to focus and keep her calm. It had nothing to do with my attraction to her whatsoever. I swear.

  When I walked back into the small room with her, I about lost my shit when I saw her unbuttoning her blouse. Shit, I didn't think I could do this if she was only in a bra. Thankfully, she was too nervous to notice my reaction, and when I saw the skin toned camisole she was wearing underneath, I sighed with relief.

  I started explained everything I was doing to distract her as I sat at my workstation, drawing up the stencil then setting everything up. She was a lot calmer when I was ready to start and invited her to sit on my tattooing chair. I prepped her skin, then placed the stencil over her right shoulder blade. By the time it dried, I had all the ink that I needed out, and my tattoo gun was ready to go, she seemed to be doing okay.

  "Are you ready, Jenny?" I asked with concern. "Last chance to back out."

  "I'm ready. Let's do this." Her voice sounded calm and firm. I couldn't see her face in the backward facing tattoo chair, but her back was tense. I fought the sudden urge that I had to kiss her opposite shoulder to reassure her. What the hell was that?

  I began the outline, and her body thrummed with tension as the needles bit into her skin for the first time. "Easy, Jenny. Breathe." She slowly relaxed as I continued working, trying to ignore how much I enjoyed being this close to her and how good her musky vanilla scent was to me. I tried to distract her and myself by talking the entire time about meaningless things. It seemed to work for both of us, because I could focus on her tattoo, and she remained calm and still for me. There were a few areas that were pretty painfu
l for her, and I could tell when she would clam up right in the middle of our conversation. She was amazing though, considering this was her first tattoo and a fairly large one.

  When I was done almost two hours later, I grabbed a hand mirror and gave it to her. She stood and went to the wall mirror nearby and took her first peek at her new tattoo. Her sapphire eyes lit up with delight as she saw it. It turned out even better than I expected, the fiery colors bursting out from her skin like fire. It was just the way I'd pictured it in my mind, right down to the bird's brilliant sapphire eyes.

  "Oh my God, Ford," she blurted out. "It's amazing. I absolutely love it. It's exactly what I wanted." She was giddy and bouncing on her feet. I couldn't help staring at her jiggling breasts again. Thankfully, she was too distracted to notice this time.

  "Good," I murmured. I bandaged up her tattoo for her as I explained the aftercare she'd need to follow. Then I cleaned up and removed my gloves with my back to her, so I couldn't watch her put her blouse on. I didn't trust myself anymore since I was starting to feel weak in my commitment to ignore temptation. Being that close to her for so long had tried my patience and my restraint, and it was time to get her out of here. I walked her out to the front and settled the bill in cash. She didn't blink at the price and gave me a huge tip.

  "Thank you, Ford." She practically gushed with gratitude, the sound of my name on her lips filling me with inappropriate thoughts about her mouth on my dick again.

  "You're very welcome, Jenny. It was my pleasure," I said softly as I stared at her lips from across the reception desk.

  She looked at me expectantly for a moment, as if I'd say or do something else.

  "Have a good night," I added to hasten her out the door.

  "You too." She sounded disappointed. Jenny finally turned and walked to the door. I took my last opportunity to admire the luscious curves of her hips and ass. I thought about all the places on her body that I'd like to put my tongue. My body vibrated with sexual tension. I was definitely going to need some quality time with my left hand later tonight.

  "The door is locked," Jenny said as she turned away from the door to face me. Shit. I forgot that I'd locked it earlier.

  "Sorry," I rumbled out apologetically as I came around the reception desk. I walked closer and caught that musky vanilla scent she wore again. Fuck me, it was intoxicating and now there was nothing to distract me from it or my body's reaction to hers. I reached into my pocket for my keys. Before I could even touch them, Jenny placed a warm hand on my forearm to stop me. That same electricity from earlier surged through me from her touch.

  "Thanks again, Ford," she whispered softly as she looked up to meet my eyes. They were deep sapphire pools of heat and desire now. She placed her palms on my chest, and it felt warm through the cotton of my tank. Son of a bitch. I liked her hands on me, and I wanted more; my rules and self-restraint be damned. I stared at her lips helplessly as they slowly curved into a triumphant smile.

  She lifted up on her toes to brush her lips along my jawline, leaving a trail of tingling fire behind them. They were just as soft as they looked, and never finding out what they felt like on mine sounded like a damn crime now. Jenny leaned back and met my gaze, her lips parting in silent invitation. Time seemed to stop, and I felt like I was at a crossroad, like this was a decision that could alter the direction of my life. It was a ridiculous notion that I was going to discard out of hand, until David's words from earlier popped into my head. It'll happen when you least expect it, Ford. Well, I hadn't expected this at all, and the attraction I felt for this woman was like nothing I ever felt before. What if this was it, and I walked away? Fuck it. My decision was made; rules be damned.

  I slipped my hands up into the soft silken strands of her dark hair, leaned down, and crushed my lips against hers. They were just as luscious and decadent as I thought. She instantly ignited, her hands wadding my shirt in her fists as she kissed me back with desperate abandon. Her lips burned against mine as she hauled me in closer, our tongues tangling and twisting, each of us battling for control. Her nails dug into my chest, and I had one last thought before letting this blazing heat between us completely consume me. What the hell have I just unleashed?

  Chapter 3

  Jenny

  As soon as my lips touched Ford's jawline, I knew I was a goner. He smelled absolutely amazing, so very male and intoxicating, and the muscles of his chest felt solid and firm under my hands. His short scruffy blond beard was softer than it looked, and it tickled my lips as I kissed along it. I knew this was a bad idea, but I couldn't seem to stop myself. There was this fire between us that wanted to ignite. I felt it the moment that I set eyes on him, and I knew he felt it too since I saw it in his eyes each time I busted him checking me out. I wanted him so badly that it nearly took my breath away.

  I leaned away and met his gaze again. His indigo eyes were darker now with a heat in them that captured me. I parted my lips in invitation, waiting for him to decide if he wanted this too. Please, please, please kiss me. It felt like I wouldn't survive if he didn't. I'd never felt anything like it before, and it was almost terrifying.

  When his hands finally slid up into my hair, and his lips came down on mine, the heat between us exploded into a blazing fire inside me. I fisted his shirt in my hands and pulled him in closer as his tongue surged into my mouth. His taste and the feel of his full soft lips were unlike anything I'd ever felt before. I think I went a little insane as I answered his demanding kiss with demands of my own. It was a battle to see who was in control of this kiss, and neither of us was willing to back down. I sank my nails into his pecs as I fought to win.

  Ford let out a deep rumbling growl that vibrated through my body as his hands clenched into fists in my hair, and he bent me backwards. He easily pushed me off-balance with the advantage that his height and strength gave him. Oh yeah, there was the fight that I craved and rarely got from a man. It made me want to fight him even harder. I tried to regain my balance, but one of his large hands gripped my ass and lifted me up onto my toes, taking all my leverage away. He pressed my body against his. I felt every hard slab of muscle against me, and I momentarily forgot to fight him.

  He hummed smugly into my mouth with his victory, the corners of his lips pulling into a slight smile even as his tongue continued exploring my mouth. He had another thing coming if he thought I'd give up that easily. I pulled my mouth away from his just enough to speak.

  "I want your dick in my mouth," I murmured in a low seductive tone, my lips brushing against his.

  "Fuck yes, you do," he snarled out in agreement, his eyes widening and darkening to pitch black. He scooped me up like I was nothing, and my fleeting advantage was gone yet again. The feel of his massive arms holding me made me moan with desire. Oh yeah, I loved being manhandled like this.

  He carried me down the back hallway and into an office at the end. I thought he was going to set me down in here so I could get on with it, but he went to another door in the corner. Once through that door, he carried me up a flight of steps, and the next thing that I knew we were entering an apartment and stopping in a large living room.

  "Well, that's convenient," I told him with a grin. "How did you rate an apartment above where you work?"

  "I own the building," he answered with a wry twist of that ungodly sexy mouth of his. I hoped after his blowjob that he'd repay the favor.

  "So you own your own tattoo shop," I stated the obvious in a wry tone. "You are so fucking hot."

  "You have no idea," he murmured as he set me on my feet, steadying me when I wobbled on my four-inch heels. He took a step back and crossed his arms as he eyed me expectantly. "Well, I'm waiting." His voice was matter-of-fact, but it did nothing to hide the pure raw lust in his eyes and emanating from his body.

  "You're not the boss of me." I leveled a defiant stare at him and started slowly unbuttoning my blouse. His eye contact faltered and flicked down to my fingers as I leisurely worked my way through each button.

&nbs
p; "Honey, by the time this night is through, I'll have you begging for it," he growled out with flared nostrils. He watched me slide my shirt off my arms and let it fall to the floor. I took a step toward him as I pulled my camisole over my head, revealing my nude lace bra and my impressive cleavage. Ford let loose another rumbling growl as he stared at my tits.

  "We'll see about that," I growled back as I stalked toward him. I stopped in front of him then slipped my fingers down into his waistband and tried to tug him toward me. It was like pulling on a boulder. He didn't even budge. His eyes danced with amusement as a corner of his mouth pulled up into a smirk. He was enjoying this battle as much as I was.

  His smirk evaporated as I sank down to my knees at his feet, my eyes locked on his. I started unbuckling his belt and his jaw clenched, his arms falling to his sides with his hands balled into tight fists. I eased the button open and slid the zipper down as I continued holding his gaze. I pulled his boxers down and reached for what I wanted. I took his cock in my hand and paused when I realized that my fingers weren't long enough to wrap all the way around him. I looked down and gasped at the sight of him. Ford was definitely well above average in length, but it was his girth that riveted my attention. The man was massive, and the wide flared head made my insides clench in anticipation. I shuddered as I wondered what it would feel like inside me.

  "Fuck me," I murmured aloud without realizing it.

  "You gotta blow me first, Jen," he said in a voice rough with arousal, the familiar way he shortened my name oddly pleasing to me. I looked up to see him smiling smugly down at me, his eyes dancing with merriment.

  I narrowed my eyes at him and ran my tongue up the underside of his dick, following the ridge all the way up to the head and wiping that smug look right the fuck off his face. His eyes fluttered once, twice, and then I suddenly took him into my mouth, giving him no warning whatsoever.

  "Holy fucking hell!" he shouted as his eyes practically popped out of his skull, his hands flying up to grab handfuls of my hair in a rough panty-soaking grip that pulled a long moan out of me. I bobbed my head up and down, sucking hard and pressing upward with my tongue, rubbing his sensitive head across the roof of my mouth with each pass.